The Amazing Wonder Blog

So A) I've already failed in my promise to post more on this blog than on any other.  Sorry, I just forget to a lot, but I've got a lot to talk about, and I just bought a digital camera, so hopefully you'll see more on here
B) I promised not to post drama, but today was punctuated by something I just had to write about

Today at work, something happened that I'd rather not go into or explain, but it really hurt my feelings, pissed me off, change my attitude about people and situations.  It will definitely have lasting effects, and while it may not seem like a big deal to some people, it really made a huge impact on me.   Needless to say, my upcoming Chicago trip is going to be a sweet escape from some of the idiocy around this stupid town.

So, with this heavy thought on my mind all night, I came home, cleaned the house, organized my bills etc. and basically focused my attention on getting some work done.  But then, about 12:10 am (I'm doing laundry) I got an email about an Honesty Box message.  If you don't know, Honesty Box is a facebook application where you can write anonymous messages to people, with them only knowing your gender.  Up until now, I've only received joke messages or very nice compliments.  Tonight, I got this message...

"You're f**king annoying. You always try to be the center of attention when you just need to sit back and not try and be an attention whore. It gets old."

Now, I've actually heard this before.  From certain people who feel it their duty to constantly remind me of this "fact."  Let me say that there is only one type of person who has ever said this to me are people who are very angry, frustrated people.  They've always been ones to point out the flaws in others and refuse to change themselves, instead declaring their personalities the one that all others should strive for.  Never have I heard this from anyone who I've looked up to, mostly people that I'm "friends" with mostly because of common organizations or friends.

I don't know what you were trying to accomplish here, "friend."  If you thought that you were helping me by saying this, you are a mean, repulsive person.  I am not an attention whore.  I am not constantly trying to be the center of attention.  Many time I DO sit back and just observe what is going on.  But I like to talk and have discussions with my friends, not just get preached at.  I'm assuming that you wrote this because I actually took up some of your precious talk at people time.  You would rather have a lecture than a discussion. 

Most people may say "Ry, just let it go, don't let it phase you."  Well, I couldn't, but writing this has sure helped.  And if the person who wrote this is reading this (I link my blog from facebook) than I hope you think before you do something so hateful and malicious.  There was no good outcome that could have possibly came from your actions, you just did this with a heart full of spite, and for that I pity you.

I've already rendered the previous blog entry null and void!
The internet is amazing

So why "TheSMUSpaz" and not "The Amazing Wonder Ryan?"

As many of you know, I'm not too fond of my old nickname.  Well, that's not true.  I like being a dude who has a nickname from college.  I'm just not too fond with people identifying me as Spaz and Spaz alone.  It's extremely frustrating to be meeting someone new and have an old frat bro or band geek friend run up and say "HAVE YOU MET SPAAAAAAAAAZ?!?"

Ugh, so annoying...

Anyway, this is the temp name I'm going with at the moment, but hopefully I can change it to something more interesting later.

TOODLES!!!

So I made a conscious decision the other day to start writing in my blog once again, and to do it more often than in the past.  Often I felt I needed to have a reason or purpose to write in it, but I'd like to simply start improving my writing skills in general.  The best way I've heard to do this?  Write more often!

Well, to be honest, I had what I thought was a very heartfelt post all written up about the recent death of my work mate Chris Allen, and how it effected me and what I'd been thinking about death recently.  It was very cathartic, but unfortunately it will probably not see the light of day.

Blog.com has been a fairly large pain in the ass since day one, but it let me post a lot of things in the sidebar, so I stuck with it for a while.  However, after writing the very lengthy post, I opted to publish, and was taken to a page simply stating "Blog no longer exists..."

Well, thank you very much Blog.com for A) deciding to destroy my blog, B) taking my yearly subscription fee anyway, and C) destroying my post when I hit back.

In general, this service seems to all ready destroy blog.com in every sense.  I can post most of the same things I did on Blog.com, it's free, it has a spell checker (you'll notice an increase in the quality of posts), and it autosaves!  HOORAY!!!

So, there's  your first of what will hopefully be many posts!  More later...

The Dandy Warhols - We Used to be Friends